By NM ‘20, Liam Warin ‘20, and Priya Phillips ‘20
Any news suggestions, headlines you think are missing, or letters to the editors of this section? Send them to [email protected]. NCS Names New Potentate Dr. Elinor Scully, head of the Langley School in McLean, Virginia, has been named the 12th Head of the National Cathedral School and shall be instated in July of 2021. Susan C. Bosland will be installed as the 11th head of NCS seeing as that she will hold the Head of School title into the 2020-2021 school year. Schofer Proves His Mettle Dr. Schofer, STA’s resident comic, proved his mettle last week with a lunchtime imitation of W. Carnahan ‘20 that hurled the refectory into uproarious laughter. Announcing a “Post Lunch Yasso” in the “Skizzle Dizzle,” among other humorous quips, Dr. Schofer weaved his name with confident hand into the tapestry of St. Albans lore. Faculty reactions to the announcement ranged from shock to hilarity. STA Soccer Triumphant in IAC Continuing their nineteen-game unbeaten streak, the Bulldogs finished their IAC campaign with a 1-0 home victory against Georgetown Prep in the IAC championship game, clinching the title. Led by goalkeeper C. Ehrenhaft ‘20 (Swarthmore ‘24), the Soccer Dogs have only conceded five goals all season. The all-star roster also includes Tufts ‘24 commit M. Brady ‘20, Columbia ‘24 commit J. Muoio ‘20, and other commits. Despite falling short against Gonzaga on Wednesday in a heartbreaking defeat that took them out of the DCSAA tournament, the team was praised for their strong and successful season. November 1st Deadline Passed The Exchanged received multiple reports of seniors running elatedly through the halls as the November 1st college deadline has passed. Many seniors have already geared into their new excuse for their laziness and procrastinatory habits—the November 15th deadline. Seniors strongly approved of the administration’s actions to avert another “Lessons and Deferrals” later this year. STA Football Felled by Episcopal Many ascribed the loss to shoddy refereeing, as a blown call handed an ill-deserved touchdown to Episcopal, snatching it from the hands of a hopeful J. Namian ‘21. The editors of this newsletter could not corroborate some students’ sightings of bulky letters passed to the referees by Episcopal coaches after the game. The final score was 27-12. Mystics Work Their Magic The Mystics have won the WNBA championship, thrusting DC Basketball back into the national fray. The Mystics’ victory ought to be a wake-up call for the Wizards, who have not won an NBA championship since 1978. OSKOM Takes Flight In a lunch announcement last week, E. Chen ‘21 and J. Leahy ‘21 announced their new club “OSKOM”—an acronym of the Greek phrase “ὁι σοφοτατοι και ὁι μεγιστοι,” or “the wisest and the greatest”—framed around philosophical discussion and analysis. Resident Classicist Lars Nordquist ‘20 lodged a strong protest to the acronym, insisting that “μεγιστοι” exclusively denotes physical size or strength rather than moral sapience, and suggested the more proper “βελτιστοι,” often translated as “best.” Chen and Leahy are yet to respond to Nordquist’s scathing rebuke. Bulldog Bash Fundraiser The Cathedral was illumined in reds and pinks Saturday night for the now-annual Bulldog Bash fundraiser, deemed by the school “an evening in celebration of the St. Albans community.” The event—open to all current alumni, parents, faculty, and staff—featured CNN’s Jim Sciutto as emcee along with a performance by St. Albans’ all-male acapella group “Jackets Off.” Nationals Vanquish Astros in Tense Finish The Nationals fulfill Bryce Harper’s promise of “[b]ringing a championship back to DC” by winning all four games in Houston and beating the Astros 6-2 in Game 7 of the World Series—becoming, so to speak, WorlDChampions. The final game ended in peak Nationals fashion, with the team driving in all six of their runs in the final three innings in a heart-stopping turn of events. A Mixed Bag for NCS Athletics NCS athletic teams ended their seasons with strong records but, unfortunately, none were able to bring home any championship titles. NCS placed second in both Cross Country and Volleyball. Athletes are now preparing for the fall sports banquet on Monday, November 12th, and the start of the winter sports season. NCS athletic teams were also unable to bring home any DC state titles. All-Girls: What Does it Mean at NCS? A student government proposal has sparked conversations among students regarding what being an all-girls school means in terms of gender inclusion. Some students raised concerns that the proposal dilutes traditional tenets of single-sex education. STA Cross Country Team Victorious Again The St. Albans Cross Country team won their eleventh straight IAC championship eleven days ago at Derwood Farm Park in Derwood, Maryland. Led by Damian Hackett ‘21, the varsity boys finished with a combined score of 30 to blow the competition out of the water. This year’s finish solidifies the program’s place as the most successful sport in STA history under the stewardship of Head Coach Jim Ehrenhaft (STA ‘83).
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